Here’s how I take care when I feel like #$@%

During this Surround Yourself with What You Love month, I’m taking special care to add more of one of my {and my family’s} favorite things: good food. I’ll set the scene two nights ago:

It was just the boys and me: dining room set, candles lit, music playing, really good I must say salmon + salad + bread w/ dipping olive oil + spices.

Before deleting with repulsion – keep reading. My perfect evening gets better:

Within ONE minute of our blessing, the boys upset each other so over … I DON”T EVEN REMEMBER?! … and my oldest ran off with his plate while my little one smugly sat.  All of that work and this is what happens? And I still hadn’t cleaned the George Foreman grill – the biggest pain in the $#@ thing there is to clean.

This was the ending of a day filled with:

  • Technical glitches galore: scanner +  passwords + “smart” phone + brand new TV {with professional installation $$$} that suddenly has no sound
  • Firetrucks + ambulances up and down the road {literally all morning} near our house which had me on edge {worried about what was going on + the sound itself is so unnerving… was glad to know it was a contained house fire & no one was injured – you would have thought it was a grand scale catastrophe}
  • Grocery shopping: which, as my friend Leigh will tell you, is not a quick thing! – there’s the meal planning + grocery list making + coupon compiling + driving to & from + actual shopping + unloading  + putting away.  Exhausting just typing that out.
  • Doctor’s appointment: Both boys together in waiting room then waiting in the OTHER room … waiting is not fun with two kids – no DS’s in sight.  Poor planning on my part, maybe.  But I’m like, “You are capable of simply sitting respectfully.”  I did get a glowing compliment from the PA, “Your boys are so well behaved!” I simply said, “Thank you!” but thought to myself, these patient room doors must be sound proof.

The purpose of this post is to let you know that you aren’t alone in the day to day struggles of keeping it together. {And what will really annoy me is KNOWING there are so many out there with WAY bigger struggles (including the one faced by the homeowner, above) but still getting frustrated with my own situations.} But no matter how big or small, we all need support in different forms. Having a go-to list for help when you need it can be extremely … helpful.

I got this idea from one of my favorite writers, Cheryl Richardson. Here is an excerpt from her book, The Art of Extreme SelfCare:

“An Extreme Self-Care First-Aid Kit is a well-prepared plan of action put in place before you need to use it. It consists of things you can do on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level that will give you comfort, connection, and a feeling of steadiness while navigating the rough waters of a crisis. When faced with a difficult period, what matters most is that you return to the behaviors and practices that reflect Extreme Self-Care as quickly as possible, so you can restore yourself to sanity and strength. That way, you’ll bring your best, most resourceful self to the challenge at hand.”

- Cheryl Richardson, The Art of Extreme SelfCare

I have my own Take Care checklist – things to keep me going / encourage me to take a break / help me regroup:

Some are more “superficial” {which is perfectly fine when that’s just what you need}:

  • my favorite … magazine, TV show, food, wine {at times, at the same time! But be careful if wine (etc) is what you use to relieve stress – during a stressful time I had to put the brakes on it – realized I was becoming too dependent on and needed to deal in different way… see next category)
  • absolutely nothing {LISTEN to what your body needs, as Well Grounded Life’s Lisa Byrne shares here in her post, Your Supposed to be Tired and Grumpy
  • pedicure {prefer over mani when in need of relaxing – there’s no lounging back & reading mags when getting your nails done!}
  • Pinterest {I really do get lost in it as I described here}
  • Music {There are times – as mentioned in next section – when I need something uplifting.  And there are times when the only thing that’ll do is really good – loud – music. My playlists are quite diverse I must say!}

Others are more “restorative“: {I learned about how to separate the two types of “self care” from WGL Lisa’s conversation with author, speaker, life coach Renee Trudeau}

  • conversation with trusted friend
  • session with therapist {or clergyman, doctor, coach … and if you don’t feel a connection with, KEEP LOOKING. It’s so important to find the right fit with this stuff.}
  • yoga {did my favorite class the morning after that day above … it’s my soulmate workout for sure – as Chalene Johnson (L O V E  her!) recommends finding}
  • time with favorite book / blog {my books & blog reads tend to be more build you up kind of reads… figured my US magazine would be considered in “superficial” category : )
  • listening to a helpful + inspiring podcast / book on tape {I learned the self care distinctions of “superficial” and “restorative” while listening to one of WGL Lisa’s taped conversations with her brand new M.A.A.P series / project: this one was with Renee Trudeau. Click HERE to learn more: really good stuff to listen to while in car – or at home. I listened to one while cleaning out the fridge the other day}.

For more ideas, I’ll include this from Cheryl Richardson’s The Art of Extreme Self Care {published by Hay House, Inc.:

 

 

This was not the post I planned to do for this week but I really do have to feel it to write it and this is what I was feeling. Surround yourself with what you love at times is easier said than done but it is crucial in taking care of yourself.  And taking care of YOURSELF is crucial to caring for everything else in life you love – including those little ones we love but at times aren’t very lovable.  

What’s on YOUR Take Care list?


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